See if you can guess the things in the following passage that are cultural faux pas or otherwise impossible in Japan:
It’s just after 7am on cool summer’s day in Cork, Ireland. Jet-lagged, I’m walking down Patrick’s Street with a croissant in one hand, and freshly brewed pour over coffee in the other. Wanting to capture this moment, I place the stuff down, whip out my phone, and snap a photo. Suddenly, I remember, ‘oh yeah, no sound’.
Once done, I throw the rubbish in a nearby bin. There’s a guy sitting there smoking a cigarette, shaking his leg like there’s no tomorrow. Since it is a little cold out, I put my hands in my pockets as I search for a public toilet. Post-coffee poos are not to be taken lightly.
A few minutes later, I wash and dry my hands, and I’m on my way.
Aight. How many did you pick up?
It’s just after 7am on cool summer’s day in Cork, Ireland.
Being in Cork, Ireland is true. I’m not just a yamabushi, don’t you know? Hansei Hanzoku and all that. All of my four grandparents have some sort of connection to Ireland, and my Grandad’s family Cork especially. So I guess I could call myself an honorary Irishman? Nah, I don’t think the Irish would let me get away with that. Especially when I proudly wear my All Blacks shirt everywhere (sorry not sorry!).
Jet-lagged, I’m walking down Patrick’s Street with a croissant in one hand, and freshly brewed pour over coffee in the other.
In Ireland, as in New Zealand, you can walk around and eat or drink without feeling guilty. Sure, you can do that at festivals in Japan, but Japanese people really don’t like it around town. I suppose it’s a bit like talking with food in your mouth; common (Japanese) sense says you shouldn’t do it. Common sense also says there should be rubbish bins around, but I don’t know (more on that in a second)…
Wanting to capture this moment, I place the stuff down, whip out my phone, and snap a photo. Suddenly, I remember, ‘oh yeah, no sound’.
This is true too. Buy a phone in Japan and you can’t get rid of the sound when you take a photo. It’s to combat voyeurism, apparently. I only know this from stealthily taking photos for participants on the mountains during yamabushi training (I swear), but there’s a very easy workaround, so easy it makes me wonder why they still bother with the sound at all. It’s an app called Simple Cam. In other words, the barrier to entry for voyeurism in Japan costs about as much as a bowl of Ramen.
Once done, I throw the rubbish in a nearby bin.
This still seems to trip people up. Everyone knows rubbish bins don’t exist in Japan. Well, they do. But they’re about as few and far between as an empty seat on the Yamanote line at 8am. Once you find one it’s exactly like coming across a Kami in the flesh.
Just like in other countries how you have to be strategic about carrying a water bottle or a keep cup (not in Japan!), you have to be strategic about getting rid of your rubbish. To be honest, I’m completely used to it now. You can sneakily get rid of rubbish at cafes and the like by adding it to the outgoing rubbish on your plate, or find a Conbini and ‘borrow’ their rubbish bin instead. Either that, or wait until you catch one of the voyeurs, and put it in their bag or something (raw rubbish is best for this).
There’s a guy sitting there smoking a cigarette,
To be honest I was surprised to see so many people smoking here, but I guess that’s a European thing (?). Japan has a weird relationship with smoking, even having a third stake in a tobacco company. Creating a bizarre world where smoking on the street was banned years ago for safety and optics, but smoking indoors in a local izakaya remained sacred tradition.
shaking his leg like there’s no tomorrow.
This!
This is a cultural faux pas in Japan. You never shake your leg if you can avoid it. The call it binbo yusuri, literally ‘poor man’s shaking’. For Japanese people, this is a sign of anxiety, impatience, lack of self control, or even worse, a ‘poor’ upbringing. It comes from an old belief whereby shaking your leg is literally shaking away your wealth, luck, or good fortune, which of course leads to, well, being poor. In other words, if you’re poor, stop shaking your leg!
Since it is a little cold out, I put my hands in my pockets as I search for a public toilet.
This one was surprising for me too, it took me a few years to get over. In Japan, as much as possible you don’t walk around with your hands in your pockets. This seemingly innocent act is anything but. Walking around with your hands in your pockets changes your posture making you look slumped and defensive. Or, it makes you seem darashinai, sloppy, lazy, or otherwise unrefined. This sends a signal that you are untrustworthy, arrogant, or “too cool” to pay attention to those around you.
In the past in Japan, hiding your hands signalled potential hostility. People were unsure whether you were holding a weapon, or in other words, hiding your intentions. Japanese kids are (apparently) taught not to walk around with their hands in their pockets, mainly as a way to help them catch their fall shall they fall over (true story). As anyone who has tried running on snow or ice with their hands in their pockets could attest to, this is good advice.
In other words, everything is about looks. Like how Takaichi says they want to avoid Japan ‘looking’ like it is unkind to foreigners, AKA it’s fine to be unkind, but not look it! Kind of like the whole phone camera making a sound thing. It’s just for show.
Post-coffee poos are not to be taken lightly.
Post-coffee poos are not to be taken lightly.
Which brings us, naturally, to the mechanics of Western toilets:
A few minutes later, I wash and dry my hands, and I’m on my way.
This one. Man.
To put it lightly, even in summer a cold toilet seat is rather unpleasant. Japan has that part very right. Forget the bidets and all the gadgets, please, for the love of Kami, introduce heated toilet seats, or at least seats that are not cold to the touch!
On that note, using a urinal in Ireland left me wondering ‘why the lack of shelf?’ Japanese urinals, and toilets in general, always have a shelf behind them for you to place whatever it is you may be holding in your hand (well, besides your penis).
So, how many did you pick up? How right am I? Let me know!
Further reading:
Daily Yamabushi Posts for July 31 to August 6, 2026
Here are my Daily Yamabushi posts for the past week. Get more Daily Yamabushi posts at timbunting.com/daily-yamabushi. Discover more Japan essays and daily insights in the Kiwi Yamabushi Substack Archive, or follow my writing over on Medium.com.
"...please, for the love of Kami, introduce heated toilet seats, or at least seats that are not cold to the touch!" Sorry, Tim, I can't agree with you on this one...